


Akira's Sass Kills a God

by SnowInkling



Category: Persona Series
Genre: Akira's sass, Gen, Hey look it's Door-kun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 22:03:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13017063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowInkling/pseuds/SnowInkling
Summary: “Can I get a reason why I’m here with a side of who are you anyways?” Akira sarcastically added





	Akira's Sass Kills a God

**Author's Note:**

> Here is a lovely shitpost that I created within the span of two days. There may be a second part, but who knows? Anyway, enjoy!

          Akira was standing in an unfamiliar place, with unsettling imagery around him. Not to mention what looked like a door situated in the middle of the room with – wait what that a person?! Akira walked up only to discover that the person was just a statue that was somehow part of the door itself. He also noticed that he was still wearing his phantom thief outfit too.

“So, uh…” Akira stuttered, officially creeped out by the place he was in, “Why _exactly_ did you bring me here?” He was speaking to a woman with short, platinum-blond hair, yellow eyes, and strange blue clothes.

“Hm?” The woman piped up, “Did I not explain the purpose for you being here?”

“If, by ‘explaining’ you mean kidnapping me just after shooting a god in the face…” Akira muttered, still unsure why he was even here to begin with. “Can I get a reason _why_ I’m here with a side of who are you anyways?” Akira sarcastically added.

“I guess that may have slipped my mind…” The woman thought aloud. “No matter. I am Elizabeth. As to why you are here…” She turned to face the door and pointed a finger at the statue, “I need you to free this man.”

“That’s not a statue?!” Akira yelled in shock. After taking a bit to calm down, he added, “Wait, _how exactly_ am I supposed to do this?”

Elizabeth answered, “By killing Nyx.”

“Who now?” Akira asked.

“The god of death.” Elizabeth explained, “Over the past six years, I have been looking for a way to free this man, and only one conclusion came to mind: to kill Nyx.”

“And _how_ am I supposed to do that?” Akira looked at Elizabeth and gave her a look that said _are you fucking serious right now?_ However, the weirdly dressed woman seemed to just brush it off and keep talking.

“By doing the exact same thing you did to Yaldabaoth.”

Akira just stared at her, dumbfounded. “…You _do_ realize that I was able to do that because of the people’s acknowledgement of the phantom thieves’ existence. _And_ because they believed in us.” Akira explained. When Elizabeth just stared back at him, he sighed, “let me see what I can do…” Akira tried summoning Satanael, who – thankfully – was still in his repertoire of personas. However, when checking over the skills he had…

“…Guess what I don’t have?” Akira yet again asked sarcastically.

“What is it?” Elizabeth returned his question with another question.

“ _The skill that killed Yaldabitch in the first place_!” Akira said through gritted teeth.

“Oh my.” Elizabeth commented, “This is quite a pickle we’re in.”

“You mean that _I’m in…_ ” Akira angrily muttered under his breath.

“You said you needed the beliefs of others to be able to use this skill?”

“No, I need the power of friendship and rainbows and ponies to kill a god with a bullet containing the seven deadly sins.” Akira sarcastically replied. If he were to be honest, he couldn’t remember the last time he was this sarcastic.

“Well, in that case…” Elizabeth thought aloud. She pulled out a tome from out of nowhere and used it to summon rainbows, ponies, and a feeling of friendship in the air.

Akira gave Elizabeth a look of disbelief. “…You know I was being sarcastic, right?”’

“Really?” Elizabeth asked, a little surprised. She paused for a minute before speaking again, “Ah, yes. Looking back on it, I _do_ get the sense of sarcasm coming from your voice.” The things she had just summoned disappeared with the snap of her fingers.

“In all seriousness, I actually do need the beliefs of others to use my god-killing skill.” Akira spoke, deadpanned.

“I have just the thing!” Elizabet exclaimed. She once again snapped her fingers, which, to Akira, did nothing.

Until a man who was also dressed in the same type of clothes as Elizabeth appeared in front of Akira. Even his hair and eye colour were the same too.

“Elizabeth why did you summon me here?” The man asked, clearly distressed.

“There’s something I need your help with.” Elizabeth answered, “But we’ll need to wait a little longer.”

The man opened his mouth, ready to argue with Elizabeth, then closed it as if he forgot what he was going to say.

“Okay, who is he?” Akira asked, his eyebrows stitching together in confusion.

Just then, someone else appeared. Another woman dressed in the same weird, blue clothes as the man and Elizabeth. The hair and eye colour also matched the other two, but her hair went as far down as her shoulder blades.

“You called, Elizabeth?” The woman asked in a calm refined voice.

“And who is she?!” Akira yelled out.

“You’re the new wild card, correct?” The woman asked. “My name is Margaret. I assume you’ve Elizabeth, yes?”

Akira nodded. _Maybe I could get along better with her than with Elizabeth…_

The man spoke up next, “I’m Theodore. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Uh… hi.” Akira said as he hesitantly waved at Theodore. Akira started to feel a sense of unease, but couldn’t tell where it was coming from, or who was causing it.

“So, what did you need us here for, Elizabeth?” Margaret asked, swiping away a stray strand of hair.

“Ah, yes.” Elizabeth started, “I have found a way to kill Nyx.”

Theodore was astonished, “You have?!”

Elizabeth replied, “Yes, for you see--”

“Elizabeth!” the voice of a small girl called out from behind Akira. He turned around to see Lavenza, with one hand on her hip while the other was death gripping the book. She continued her yelling, “Why did you bring Akira here?! His friends are waiting for him to return, you know!”

“Lavenza?” Margaret breathed. From what Akira could tell, she looked like she was going to lose her composure, “You’re alright! Thank goodness…”

Theodore started crying, while Elizabeth ran over to Lavenza and scooped her up in a great big hug.

“Elizabeth, please let go of me!” Lavenza cried out, clearly embarrassed from the attention she was getting.

Akira turned to look at the what he originally thought to be a statue, asking, “So does this stuff happen often?” Just as he expected, the statue said nothing. “Of course, it doesn’t happen to you; _you’re a fucking door!_ ” Akira then sighed, adding “Why the hell am I even talking to a statue…?” His sass didn’t help when the uneasy feeling grew increasingly worse, as if something worse than the reaper was drawing nearer.

The others must’ve felt it too, because they stopped what they were doing and looked towards the statue. “Remind me why we’re all here again?” Theodore asked, the fear in his voice palpable.

“I need you all to believe in me, so I can use a skill that will let me shoot this ‘Nyx’ thing in the face.” Akira let out.

“What?!” Margaret blurted out. “Is that even possible?!”

“He killed Yaldabaoth,” Lavenza commented, “The being that imprisoned and impersonated our master and split me in two.”

“ _What is this I see_?” A piercingly dark voice echoed from the shadows, “ _Another with the power to defeat me, eh_?” The disembodied voice started to appear from the shadows, appearing as a humanoid creature wearing a white, full-face mask, and wings protruding from its back. If Akira hadn’t experienced horrors such as faking his own death, he would’ve been frozen with fear long before it appeared.

“And I suppose you’re the thing I’ve been hired to take down?” Akira asked nonchalantly.

“ _Like you could defeat me, brat_!” It spat out.

“Really? Wanna bet on that?” Akira smirked.

“ _Foolish being! You stand before Nyx Avatar. Your death here is certain._ ”

“ _Ooaa_ , I’m _shaking_ in my _winklepickers_.” Akira let out, acting frightened.

“…Is he always like this?” Theodore asked Lavenza.

Lavenza let out a disheartened sigh, “Unfortunately, yes.”

“ _You have no right to try to end me. You were wanting to die, correct_?” Nyx spoke again, still addressing Akira

“If, by ‘wishing for my death’, you mean tricking the entirety of Japan – and I guess the rest of the world – that I died just to make a badass comeback, then I would gladly do it again.” Akira answered in a calm, cool manner, “And besides, the only one wishing for the sweet release of death is actually you, isn’t it?”

This time, Nyx didn’t respond back, but instead let out a terrifying scream. “Aw, did I strike a chord with the big bad death god?” Akira asked in an extremely condescending tone. Nyx then used Almighty attack, dealing heavy damage to Akira.

“Okay yeah, I’m done with the sarcasm.” Akira’s voice rang out in pain. He then turned his head to the Velvet room attendants and shouted, “I could use a little help here! Like being healed, or being believed in! Either would be _great_!”

“Please, free my guest from his eternal slumber!” Elizabeth yelled, determined for Akira to end Nyx.

“Put an end to Nyx once and for all!” Theodore yelled with the same amount of determination as Elizabeth.

Margaret surprised everyone by shouting, “Kick his ass out of existence!”

Lavenza angrily shouted, “Just take Nyx down, already!”

Akira could feel an immense amount of power flow throughout his mask, as much as – if not more than – the amount that took down Yaldabaoth. He put a hand up to his mask, summoned Satanael, and grinned evilly. He pulled out his gun, pointed it at Nyx, and said, “Give my regards to Yaldabitch when you see him in hell, you obsolete trash.”

The sound of a gunshot reverberated throughout the room as everyone looked upon the gaping hole in what was once Nyx’s face. “ _Im…possible… How… can I…_ ” Nyx didn’t get to finish its sentence before fading out of existence.

“You were easier to take down than yaldy…” Akira said as his victory speech.

“He did it…” Theodore stared at Akira with a sense of fear and amazement, “He killed Nyx. The one being that couldn’t die.”

“No,” Margaret stepped in, “His sass is what ended up killing Nyx.”

“That was splendid!” Elizabeth exclaimed as she clapped her hands together.

“Can we please hurry this up?!” Lavenza impatiently said, “Everyone’s waiting back in Shibuya!”

“Ah, right. I forgot everyone’s waiting for me to return.” Akira said.

“I swear…” Lavenza sighed as she shook her head in disappointment.

Before Akira and Lavenza left, everyone heard the cracking of stone coming from the door in the middle of the room. The Statue that was a part of the door was breaking away, as if to say it didn’t need to be there anymore. Once the statue finished falling apart, it revealed a blue-haired boy wearing a school uniform with a red armband on his left arm.

Akira walked up to the boy, while trying Lavenza’s already thin patience. “So, you’re Door-kun?” Akira asked, his sass still prevalent.

“And I suppose you’re my knight in shining armor?” The boy retorted. There was a small pause before the two boys broke out into laughter.

“Ah, I’ve never met someone with my level of sass before,” Akira sighed as he calmed down, “Name’s Akira Kurusu.” Akira stretched an arm out to the boy.

“Likewise,” The boy said as he wiped a tear away from his eye. He then took Akira’s hand to shake it. “I’m Minato Arisato.”

“Nice to meet you.” Akira replied, pulling his hand away from Minato’s. “Wanna get some curry? It’s a good meal to wake up to.”

Minato pondered for a bit, “Eh, why not?”


End file.
